I'm unhappy in my engagement, should I continue?

I'm a 17 year old Muslim living in America. I was born and raised here. 2 years ago, I was with a guy and made the BIGGEST mistake of my life, my parents found out and now I'm doomed. I went to Jordan 9 months ago, met a guy (it was sort of planned we meet, we saw pictures of one another) I liked him, he liked me (obviously, we were attracted PHYSICALLY to each other and we only talked for a week or so). We've been together 9 months now but I've found that I'm not comfortable talking w/him, I can't confront him when he does something that saddens me. My mother alway told me that it's "my choice" & that if I'm not comfortable w/him, I can't marry him, but now she's saying I'm a shame & that we've gone too far to break his and his family's heart. I feel forced and pressured because of my past mistake. IEveryone (my family) is ganging up on me; each time my fiance and I talk, I'm unhappy, unimpressed, and dying inside because he shaped me into the perfect girl, but I get nothing in return. I lost 50 pounds for him, I look good everyday even though he can't see me, it's all for him to be happy, but I'M not happy. Today, he tells me, "Where have you been these past few days?" & HE'S the one who hasn't called because he's working, he tells me, "You don't e-mail me, text me, you don't send me new pictures." but the thing is, a few weeks ago, I sent him pictures without him even sking me to and he didn't say ANYTHING about them, not that they were pretty or I looked good. THEY WERE BIRTHDAY PICS, he didn't even ask how my b-day was or where I went. I was crushed, so I gave up! I don't know what to do, I feel so trapped and everyone is using the excuse of my past & saying I HAVE to get married before I make the same mistake, but I KNOW I won't after all the crap I've gne through from the first time I made the mistake. He's a good guy who prays and all that,but I personally don't feel comfortable talking w/him, I don't feel like I can lve with him in the same house; I can't spend the REST OF MY LIFE w/someone I'm not happy with. Advice... any experience with this?